Building a new path to whānau wellbeing

Through listening, Shama Ethnic Women’s Trust recognised that true whānau wellbeing requires a holistic approach. Their new service for ethnic men is creating impact being shared across New Zealand.

For over 20 years, Shama Ethnic Women’s Trust has been a source of support for women in Waikato ethnic communities. Their kaupapa has always been to listen, and through listening they identified a crucial gap.

For a long time, men had been asking, “What about us?” The call came from women as much as from men, saying they wished their partners had someone to walk alongside them too. Shama’s social work team were already walking alongside women, but without someone to support men, their work could only go so far.

Recognising that true whānau wellbeing required a holistic approach, the women of Shama made a courageous decision to create a dedicated service for ethnic men. The Ministry of Social Development’s Te Huringa ō Te Ao initiative, which invests in locally-led services for men ready to take responsibility for violence and make positive change, provided the opportunity to do this.

A foundation of trust

It began with what the team calls ‘cultural humility’ – approaching every person with a blank slate, free from the biases they often face. This culturally-safe approach, guided by their Ethnic Advisory Group, was also shaped by community engagement, including the Let’s Talk Men project in 2022 and 2023 and three hui held in Hamilton and Wellington. Shama’s years of experience working with ethnic communities and social work ethics ensure the mahi is truly community-led.

“We always were led by ethnic women, for ethnic women. So for us it was really important that if we were going to do something for men, it needed to be led by men,” says Shama Strategic Manager Silvana Erenchun Perez.

“We appointed Gurvinder Singh as our Navigator for this service, who had experience working with men, and also an advisory group made up of diverse ethnic men so the service truly belongs to them.”

With Gurvinder being one of the very few ethnic kaimahi tāne in the family violence space, creating a foundation of trust was paramount. The philosophy, Gurvinder says, is simple: “The journey is theirs, not ours.”

The ripple effect of healing

This approach creates the safety needed for profound change. Gurvinder shares the story of a father who had been disconnected from his three older children for years. Through their mahi, using tools like the ‘Circle of Control’, the father learned new ways to connect.

At a Matariki gathering where they were around each other again, instead of confrontation, he approached his son with accountability and aroha. “I’m so sorry, son, for putting so much weight on your shoulders,” he told him.

It was a breakthrough moment. That night, his sons returned home for the first time in two years.

Sharing the knowledge

With Shama’s new service officially launching in September 2025, the demand is already clear. The need for culturally responsive support for men is immense, and the mahi is already creating opportunities for continual learning about what works for men and whānau.

Silvana says, “You can ask Gurvinder – heaps of his partners call him from Thames or Tauranga to go and talk, in Wellington they want him. Everyone wants a little bit of what Gurvinder is learning and experiencing and to find out what is working for him.”

That learning is being shared across Waikato and beyond, connecting kaimahi tāne across the country to strengthen services so communities can be violence-free. This is the power of a service designed not just for a community, but by it. Its impact is ready to be shared far and wide.